Monster

Well, pity poor old David Moyes. Not only is he manager of a crap club, he has a crap team as well - and pretty clueless players. The passion of the Merseyside derby kept Everton in it at 1-2, and even at 1-3 - but 2 players get themselves sent off for stupid pointless tackles. All adds to the fun!

So, pretty good so far this Christmas - just wish Chelsea would stop having the luck of the referees. Joe Cole should have been sent off, and so not able to set up one winner and score another. That could have been 4 points dropped. But so it goes.

Meanwhile, the breadcrumbs are getting sick of Daddy Day Care as Mrs Breadwinner goes off to get paid for eating biscuits with her mates. They keep asking if they can go to nursery. No, you can come with me to PC world to buy a wireless router. What more top entertainment could they ask for?

Inbetween times we watch Monster Inc. Pretty good the first time, ok the second time. It is the realisation that we will be watching it the hundredth time that gets to me. At least they have bored of Monkey Story (Tarzan) at last.

Anyhow, thought you might appreciate a cool car...

Top entertainment

We were great, they were crap and Lee Bowyer got sent off. Again. Who could ask for anything more? Liverpool 2, Newcastle 0. And they were lucky to get nil. We on the other hand should have had 4 or 5.

Bring on the Toffee men.

Merry MFing Christmas

as the boys from South Park say.

Today's spam includes - Insane Daddy Assrammed.
Not quite Dead Nigger Storage, but an interesting band name anyhow.

and what have we done?

I've fallen over the finishing line of the year, rather than breasting the tape with aplomb. But who cares. Another year over - the new one a week away.

2005 will not be missed in my house - and the work year ended with being rejected (for more work - not at the Christmas party). No worries - enough to do in 2006. About which I foolishly feel more positive.

There is the return of the prodigal to look foward to on Boxing day when Newcastle come to play.

And my in-laws come today - so better get tidying up.
Meanwhile the breadcrumbs are almost glowing with excitement. Which means we are up to 8 on the tantrum scale. It is going to take a week to calm them down. Make that a month.

More from Tom R on giving away free tracks

" the record companies would have paid me so little (and
so late) for each record sold that it makes absolutely no difference to my
financial situation whether these downloads are sold or given away. Whereas
artistically I'm delighted every time they reach a new listener. No contest
really. have a good xmas..."

still remarkably generous of him. Kudos to Tom Robinson.

free music

A gift from the talented Kristin Hersh. My pleasure to promote.

The accompanying text says "With "Free Music" 50FootWave is seeking new earballs. We thought it'd be interesting to ask for your energy & enthusiasm rather than your money and see what happens. To that end, please share this music in any and every way you see fit. Burn CDs, post the mp3s, seed Torrents -- whatever's comfortable for you.
It's an experiment. Who knows how it will go? Wheee!"

I was alerted to this by Warren Ellis on his site, which also has a link to his Apparat Podcasts. I recommend number 8 featuring the wonderful Elephant Thursday. Who they, I hear you ask?

More free music courtesy of Tom Robinson - mult-talented performer, broadcaster, writer etc. etc.

http://www.tomrobinson.com/records/downloads.htm

Pretty good of him to make this out of print stuff available for free.

Merry Christmas

I'm off to see the Bootleg Beatles - as the bootleg Mark Chapman

Thank you to Half Man Half Biscuit for putting things into context.
25 years ago John Lennon was shot - and we haven't heard the bloody end of it yet. No wonder Paul is so pissed off.

John Lennon was a wonderfully talented, and deeply flawed and damaged man. I dare say the years of heroin addiction didn't help, and I know something about pissing your career up the wall myself. However, he was not a god. The current wave of remembrance is getting on my nerves.

Calling an airport after him seems reasonable - and Chapman is obviously a nutter who should spend the rest of his life locked up. Can we get back to listening to the records now? And forget running 35 year old interviews with a man deranged with drugs, a mad new wife, and breaking up the best thing he would ever do?

Word magazine just called Imagine the worst song ever - I wouldn't go that far.
But please not again. Howabout Instant Karma?

Talking of which, nice to have a boring draw with Chelski and come top of the group. I just hope that UEFA do keep us apart in the next round. And even nicer to see that Essien is likely to get his for his attempt to break Didi Hamann's leg.

In commemoration, here is a picture of my favourite moment of the Champions League - the running to congratulate Dudek as they realised they had actually done it.

the fault, dear Brutus, is not in the stars but in ourseles

Ain't that so. Another waste of time, and my life passes me by as I carry this monkey on my back.
Anyway, on with the motley.

Great CD with Uncut this month, featuring some of fun loving Johnny Plee's favourite tracks. Actually just as good as the official double CD in my opinion. And a source of legit copies of some tracks I had downloaded from "inofficial" sources.

Meanwhile, the mighty reds prepare to take on Chelski. Again. And I don't know whether to care or not. Saturday was great as Crouchie got off the mark. Twice. Don't argue! Twice. The whole ground erupted in laughter as well as cheers. After all that time, it had to be a ridiculous fluke.

I have to miss the Middlesborough game on the basis of still being married to Mrs Breadwinner who thinks that 4 home games in one month is unreasonable. Can't disagree really.

I think that in practice I would prefer us to win in Japan. World Champions has such as nice ring to it, don't you think?

Grow'd up

Breadcrumb no2 is growing up fast. At the weekend she took Mrs Breadwinner into the utility room (aren't we posh) and told her she knew a secret. That Daddy didn't call her Mummy - he has a special name for her. No 1 son looked on frankly disbelieving his sister's stupidity. He'd never heard anything so daft. Of course our names, and indeed job descriptions, are Mummy and Daddy.

Its awful quick that they grow up. They are now awaiting the arrival of Auntie Claws. Who brings presents apparently.

Meanwhile, I feel on the edge of not being ill for the first time in 2 months. It could be good. Will take a while to get used to. On the plus side, the soon to be patented "illness diet" has done both me and Mrs Breadwinner the world of good on the slimming front.

Oh, and a word to the wise - she tells me that her bosses (who just had dinner with Gordon - yes, that Gordon) expect a recession starting oooh, about now. You have been warned. Pray for a mild winter.

Mark E Smith reads the football scores

And this you didn't know you needed to see. Honest. M E Smith reads the football results on Grandstand. Cue Theme from Sparta FC

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/s.bending/index.html

Time is the fire in which we burn

As Dr Soong says in Generations. And it is true. When do we get enough time? When we retire? When the kids grow up? When we die? When we are in a Vietnamese gaol facing a firing squad (hello Gary Glitter)?

Wrote a long post from the Gulf, which was swallowed by the ether. And is lost, like tears in rain...

what the fuck is it about mornings?

I mean why do people who like them think they are morally superior to people who don't? Like me. So I am currently in a differnent time zone so technically getting up half an hour before I go to bed (copyright Monty Python), and it is not making me a better person!
QEFuckingD, as they say.
I am not sure where I am, as if I ever am. Well it isn't the first world, because there are too many poor people, and it isn't the new world and the third world does not have Ferrari showrooms. Does this make it the zeroth world?
What it does is make me want to be rich, because it would be so much nicer. I mean the money and stuff would be great, as would the not working, but the rich get to make and stay in such nice environments. Bit Disney, but I have no problem with that. It is like real life but nicer, easier and bloody expensive. Ah, Richworld - that's where I am.

blessed st michael

2 goals in 5 minutes to beat the Argies. THAT is why we needed Michael Owen back!

The Fellowship of the Sins

A Martin Scorscese adaptation of Tolkien, where a bunch of young seminary students go on a long trek to return a piece of the true cross.

Well it could happen.

Apparently this blogging larke ain't making me money.

My blog is worth $0.00.
How much is your blog worth?

The Mighty Reds triumphed 3-0 over Anderlecht. But I can't help thinking that Chelsea lost out of spite. Now we have to take a point from Real Betis to go through or face having to get a result at Stamford Road. Bastards. I can't even be happy when they lose!

The Habit

In a hole in the ground lived a Hobbit. Someone must have been telling lies about Bilbo B, because one fine day, without doing anything wrong, he was arrested.

Just testing out a new form of literary mash-up. Looks rather promising to me. Future titles will include the Two Towels, in which Bilbo B stakes his claim to a position on the beach.

One goes out, one comes in. Friend of a Friend (Friend^2?) has just died of alcoholism, and another friend has brought a new flower into the world. So it Goes.

Reminder of the damage of addiction, and the Habit. So, we start again with a day 1 and keep striving for the path.

Cameron or Davis? The young Tories all muttered Cameron...

No terrorist attacks in this country for ages. Obviously our governments totally paranoid attempts to make us all carry identity cards (which the bombers would have been entitled to), produce 40 different types of ID to open a bank account (which the Economist points out is then never studied because there are too many financial transactions to track, and besides terrorism is low cost) is having an effect. Not by detecting terrorists as such, but they are spending all their time filling in bloody forms.

So, let's have the Daleks view of this. Or possibly the new Doctor Who.

Pete and Me

Well, we're both addicts. That's what we've both got to face up to, and work out.
Both of us will cause lots of problems for ourselves until we sort it out.
But he is sleeping with Kate Moss.

Whereas this has just been a bad week for me. Relapse, don't do it. Got excuses but they don't count. Anyway on holiday for a week or so, which is a good chance to work on my next stretch of 10 - one day at a time.

As soon as this pub closes, the revolution starts.

I am Jack

The voice is still chilling after 25 years. For a long time we thought it actually was the Ripper, and so Peter Sutcliffe was left free. Free to kill Jackie Hill. I was about 50m away at the time, watching Not the Nine O'clock news if I remember correctly. Of course we could have gone to the pub instead, and then she would have been alive - but none of us would have known a thing and it would have been a lost memory.

The next day I walked 2 girls home, and slowly put together the massive Police presence and news of the death of a girl. "You don't do that for a stolen bike" someone said.

Who knows whether the hoaxer really lead to 3 more deaths. The real blame is of course with Sutcliffe who could have stopped, or never stated, anytime. But I think they will throw the book at this guy. He would have been in his early 20s. Maybe it was a joke. Maybe it was a way of making himself feel important. Given that he seems to be an unemployed drunk that is quite likely.

I don't want vengence or disproportionate punishment. What is an appropriate punishment? I hope it has been 20 years of guilt

Don't have a GOW man

GOW standing for Grumpy Old Woman, a companion programme to the Grumpy Old Men programmes that the BBC showed last year. The problem was that the men complained, whined and bitched about all sorts of stuff - baldness, thongs, parking attendants, young politicians, teen magazines, rock music - whereas the women had only one topic - Men. And apparently all men are the same - uncaring, undomesticated, incapable of multi-tasking, and a burden to women. So I switched off, went upstairs to give my ill wife her medication, changed my son's nappy, and went to bed in a grump.

As they said on the Arab conflict earlier, "I joined the Pissed off club".
And what a depressing programme that was - both Israel and Palestine are ill served by their leaders. The USA too it seems. Colin Powell was a rare noble man trying to do something for the greater good rather than immediate political advantage and/or revenge. Arafat is dead now, and clearly the wrong man to lead a nation - though he may have been suited to the struggle. Sharon is mendacious and old - younger men pay with their blood for his ego and fanaticism.
Hard to see a good outcome, or any other outcome than more death and destruction.

Tramp the dirt down

So, John Peel Day was the same as Margaret Thatcher's 80th birthday. The Good die young it seems. Though we can but hope that she lives everything she did brought down to ashes.

Not a big Elvis Costello fan. Like Ben Elton I liked him "back in the day" but somehow the 80s just seem so long ago, and he never translated. Still, better than Ben Elton who I now think is just short of the anti-Christ of humour. How can the man who co-wrote BlackAdder write such turgid dross. With thinly veiled misogyny and a Islington sneer about anything and anyone not rich, in the media and living in London.

But, Elvis did write Tramp the dirt down on Spike about Thatchers grave. I shall take myself off to do that when the blessed day comes. And Rejoice.

Though I expect there will be a queue.

John Peel Day

And it should be an annual institution too. Apparently Sheila comes from Shipley. Always thought it would be Norfolk.

I can still hear JP's voice, and always the music.

Thanks

BMFA

I guess the theme song for the last post should have been Martha Wainwright's Bloody Motherfucking Asshole (or BMFA for short). Kind of gets to the heart of things, I think.

So looks like this is about day 10, and though it has been both hairy and a bit close to the wind (which sounds like today's theme) we got there. Now on to the next 10, or even just the next day at a time.

engage Rant mode

Ok, I am now officially fucked off with Flash Graphics. IMHO nothing shows a company up as a bunch of cunts as much as a fucking Flash Graphics website. Takes ages to fucking download, and then stops you doing anything useful while bombarding you with bloody awful sounds and images. And they all seem to be in tossing black.

Will you just FUCKING STOP IT. It is not big and not clever.

Tossers.

End rant mode

Day whatever of 10, probably 9

travelling in hope not expectation

So I was actually rather optimistic on the way to Anfield. A 1-4 stuffing later, rather less so. We were actually pretty reasonable, but Chelski had obviously targetted Djimi and he cracked under the pressure. After that we were always chasing the game and got punished badly.

Ho hum.

Anyway, this is day 7 I think. Not too bad.

bilal

And there you are - enjoy.

Dignity

A rare commodity, but oddly enough possessed by Jaimie Carragher. How odd.
So nil-nil against Chelski, but Mr. Abramovich will have an extra £6bn to comfort him having sold his oil and gas company. No doubt keeps him warm at nights in more ways than one.

Struggling today - day 3. The demons return. As Mick McCarthy said, its not a monkey on my back but a whole monkey house...

Still, next!

There should be a picture here from graphic artist Enki Bilal - who works mainly in France as a BD artist and film director. Not the sort of films that ever crop up in the UK, being mainly a) French, b) Science Fiction and c) Mad. But part of the same mad mythology of Egyptian gods being aliens interbreeding with humans that he uses in his BD. Oh, and did I mention the gratuitous nudity?

Blogger doesn't seem to want to upload, so I'll try later.

Speed

You know your life is too full when you are irritated by how long it takes to pee.

I'm there.

jose

Well, he sure knows how to provoke a reaction. "it wasn't a goal. Liverpool are not worthy champions". Pouring gasoline on a fire time

And start of day 2 - and the cravings are starting. But only 2 of 10.

Don't look back

Excellent documentary on Dylan on BBC2. Would love to see part 2, but I suspect my viewing credits with Mrs. Breadwinner have been already spent for the week, and any remaining will be spent on watching the Mighty Reds against Rouble FC. Not holding out any hopes, but then again I didn't last year.

Interesting article in Esquire on the nature of addiction. Hints include not stopping when it becomes damaging, and the usual mood swings and stuff. So, ok, I am an addict.
One day at a time here I come. Again.
Day one...
Perhaps better to set goals...
Day one of 10.
Is that a start?

Wake up Boo!

Summer's gone...
Put the paddling pool and bouncy castle in the shed at the weekend, and we won the ashes on Monday. Pretty strong hints that winter is here. And the weather reflects - driving rain and cold.

So, it feels time for soccer. And the Mighty Reds play the Scum on Sunday. Which luckily gets me away from visit of Mrs Breadwinner's mad sister and satan spawn. I may leave today.

And will try not to laugh too much about Everton losing 5-1 to Dynamo Bucharest and being on the verge of dropping out of 2 European competitions in a month. TMR (to abbreviate) mugged Real Betis on Tuesday, so we have bragging rights for a while.

The reference for anyone who did not get it is to the Boo Radleys wonderful single Wake up Boo.

Will someone tell me why I keep watching Lost? I mean I think its great. But why do I think that? I couldn't begin to explain.

Thought for the day: I have neither been there nor done that - Bart Simpson

The power of context

Halfway through Friday's European Super cup I was agreeing with my brother in-law that it was in essence a meaningless friendly that just disrupts the early season. Of course by the end, I realise the true importance of the trophy as a contest to determine the true champions of Europe - well I did after our victory over CSK Moscow.
So only the Premiership left to win this century!

Bit of a bugger to draw Chelsea in the Champions League group stages. Oh, and how we laughed when the Toffees were kicked out into the UEFA cup. If that is such a meaningless bauble, let them try to win it!

Hard to bear seeing the blessed Michael in Newcastle's stripes. But I am confident it will only be for a season. Though it is hard to see it doing his development any good, playing with the Magpies. Fond of them as I am, they have been relentlessly crap for decades apart from wor Kev's season of brilliance and mental imbalance.

I bought my wedding suit in Neiman Marcus in New Orleans. Sorry to see it drowned by Hurrican Katrina.

Relapse city

Man flu. But luckily I found sympathy in the dictionary.
Anyway that seems to have triggered a relapse, so lets start again. I am addicted blah blah blah.
And today is my anniversary. Lucky old us.

Also the anniversary of when I should have got more work in probably.

Rumour is that St Michael may come back to the Red fold. Please let it be so.

Image is more Banksy. Would like to have some of his Israeli work. The withdrawal from Gaza is on today, with settlers complaining about rough handling from the army as they are evicted from their homes. Can't say that the Israeli army isn't equal opportunity.

3 am eternal

Well got a meeting this afternoon where I somehow have to convince people that the work I can do in the next 45 minutes is 3 months worth. Just like being at school. When I was 12 or so we had a 3 month history assignment, that I immediately forgot all about. One Friday the teacher told us to hand it in on Monday. Oh joy. I immediately discovered the joys of working all day and all night in the city library. Got a B. A sadly formative experience. Told me I could get away with stuff. Mrs Breadwinner just does not understand. Why would you not do it on time?

Weakling. Talking of which we are back on a day one.

Listening to KLF Chill out album for the first time. God, they got the ambient/trance template spot on first time out.

more adventurous

Once upon a time the plan was to be a music blog, before the lack of talent and time stopped me. Not that it stopped lots of other people. ANYWAY, since that time I should have been banging a drum about Rilo Kiley - but it was hip then so I didn't, and now the fuss has died down I can try to stoke it up again by saying how brilliant their new album is.

You can hear for yourself on their website, or interestingly, try some of the concert and acoustic versions available on http://www.rilokiley.net/multimedia/

I recommend It's a hit, More Adventurous, Does he love you and the sublime Portions for Foxes.

Meanwhile the mighty Reds sleepwalked through the victory over KFC Big Kahuna Burger, or whoever they were - Lithuania's finest. Good showing from them. Pity about the Norwich City shirts. NEXT!

Pop quiz - Milan Baros or Michael Owen? Exactly. Wish we would welcome him home.

oh Michael I hardly knew you...

So, the blessed Michael is toying with joining the Scum, and the mighty Reds don't want him back. I feel sorry for him - basically he is being forced out of Real Madrid because he doesn't sell many t-shirts.

It would be too strange to see him in another team's shirt - particularly MUFC, or Arsenal - but he is class, and undervalued, act. We never gave him the love he deserved, or that we gave St. Stephen, Carra or God. I only hope he scores the winning goal in the World Cup final for England.

Meanwhile, I am on two a day (Gibson reference) which is not good when you are supposed to be giving up. But excuse is having a 24 hour bug for 2 days over the weekend. The damn man-flu that women always complain about .

Thoughts go out to the family and girlfriend of the poor lad killed in Liverpool on Friday for being Black. I thought we were beyond that.

And so farewell, King Faisal. Most of us thought you were dead already. Maybe you were. Mrs Breadwinner once dated a man so rich that for tax reasons his father died legally six months after he did so physically.

And we have another planetoid in the solar system. Or if you count Pluto as a planet, a tenth planet to be call Xena (after the warrior Princess). Excellent. I look forward to the future discovery of Buffy the asteroid belt, and the Aeryn Sun!

The picture is the familiy portrait - the only picture of our solar system from the Outside, taken by one of the Voyager space probes (no doubt shortly before it took part in Star Trek). This is where we live folks.

you can't put your arms around a memory

But the past is always with us, jesus said. Or was that the poor. No, the poor are us. Or me.
Latest bank statement should have had an X-certificate. Wish I knew where it all went. We seem to be a grand a month down each month. Big money.

Anyway, the British comic book heroes are being revived by Alan Moore and his daughter (well mainly her actually), and I can't quite explain (or remember) why this image just does it for me. This is the cover of Albion #1.

Robot Archie. I will never forget you, even though I can't actually remember.

Now with added introspection

Well, what do you expect - it is a blog.
So another day one - off we go.

The photo is a desert version of The Dig.
Reference is William Gibson's terrific novel Pattern Recognition.

less than zero

Back to square one. Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of my life etc.

Talking of Art Brut, as we weren't here is the link to their download page which cunningly only has versions of their songs by their franchisees. You mean other bands aren't franchises? How very 1970's


http://artbrut.nikkidido.com/mp3.html

PS come on the mighty Reds vs the might of Lithuania. Sorry, still to early.

moblog failure

So there I was being hip and trendy and up to date, and not at a fat sad loser in his forties, typing in a blog entry in Starbucks. Admittedly in Romford, which is not exactly the centre of the universe, but is at least sort of London, which other people than me think is rather cool. And finishing it with a reference to actually hip and trendy band Art Brut, the bloody wifi connection cut out on me demanding more money with menaces.
Ho hum. I am a fat loser. I mean fat-loser...

Art Brut = Top of the Pops
Art Brut = Top of the Pops

Please do not - groundhog day

So, will they be getting ready to dance in the streets of Total Network Solutions tonight? After all, 3-nil down is all to play for, as we proved in Turkey.
Hopefully not.

Scaryduck has an ongoing strand about his legal battles with Usless Workshy Cunshie of a Builder (or UWCS for short, or possibly his name if he is Polish). Think we might have to do one about some of business partners, who should rejoice in the abbreviation UWCBP. I mean, I'm pretty flexible about deadlines myself (Douglas Adams: "I love deadlines. I love the whoosing noise as they go by") but really starting a three month project on a Monday when it has to be in on the Wednesday is pushing it.

Here's Banksy...

another day 3

So the mighty Reds beat Leverkusen, and Tiger Woods beat Colin Montgomery. And still all before the Ashes even start. Feels odd.

The breadcrumbs had a new toy - a home bouncy castle. Fun, but no more fun than jumping on an air mattress, and of course, less fun than the box it came in.

On a positive note for other blogs, I have taught them to look for the Scaryduck in their bedtime book version of the Ugly Duckling. Other "improvements" include Snow White being cured by a passing handsome Prince Doctor - more in keeping with Mrs Breadwinner's cultural values.

Back to the beginning Day 1 again

Blessings be bestowed on Saint Stephen of Anfield for smiting the mighty TNS 3-0. And all this before the Ashes series even starts. Sorry, but there is something wrong about that.
Luckily herself was absent so there will be no tutting unless I forget not to talk about it.

Meanwhile, classics of addiction - the voices telling you one won't hurt, then that when you have had one you might as well have another. One is too many, all in the world not enough.

Day 6 - The Band Played Waltzing Matilda

So, today was going to be facetious comments about listening to Heather Small singing "what have you done today" for 7 years.

Instead, London and G8 were visited by Al Queda.
Some 30 dead and counted. Hundreds wounded including amputations.
And it won't make a blind bit of difference.
The pointlessness of it is incredible. Particularly as it is so un-Islamic (assuming that is the source of this, and not the IRA or anti-capitalists).

Watching protestors up in Scotland getting carried away with the thrill of violence against property and people, was like seeing the pigs turning into the farmers at the end of Animal Farm - becoming the brutes they were protesting against.

Scotland suffered brutal repression for centuries under English rule, as did Ireland. Ireland forced a civil war but were not able to claim the whole island and have spent 80 years fighting a civil war/rebellion/terrorism campaign that has left them more directly controlled by England than Scotland - which gently siddled off with its own parliament and no backward glances.

Violence begats violence, and violence against civilians does not change regimes.

Meanwhile the focus is back on the war on terror not making life better for millions of Africans, or billions of people who might be effected by global warming.

Pointless.

Day 5 - Victory in Europe

Well, over Paris 2012 anyway. God, I wouldn't want to be Chirac's cat at the moment.
Meanwhile, the blessed Tony can do no wrong. Of course he wasn't elected Pope, but that's the only thing that's not gone his way recently.

And St. Stephen has decided to stay. At least for today.

NMP
KIS
RPT
Struggling...

day 4

Did you know they've found a new type of dolphin? How do they tell them apart?

Anyway, Stevie G. Doesn't want to stay. Don't let us hold you back son. If you gotta go, go now. Just try to balance out losing the respect and gratitude of Liverpool with the Russian riches. How long before they shout Judas?

Thanks and so long for all the fish. Honestly. Thanks.

PS if you see Michael, don't forget to ask how the winning trophies thing is going at Real Madrid. And what it is like to be on the bench. And not being Captain.

But thanks. We couldn't have done it without you. We just thought you would always be with us.

Leave them all behind...

What Creaton Band are you?





You Are... Ride.

Oh yes oh yes oh yes

Campioni, campioni!

For the first time in 21 years the mighty reds are champions of Europe. Gulp!.
And it was bloody Alavez all over again. More drama than you could shake a stick at.

In the UEFA cup final, myself and herself were in a far flung foreign sports bar. She was chatting to an elderly Indian gentleman who supported Crystal Palace (go figure, as our colonial cousins say). I was repeatedly falling to my knees and wailing. Not in the call to prayer, but as we seemed to find endless ways to avoid winning until the glorious foot of McAllister in the last minute of extra time.

For Man U vs Bayern we were in a wine bar in posh South Manchester, home to Roy Keane and the Neville Brothers (and my celebrity stalker Bryan Robson). As events unfolded the watching scum (and me a temporary one) got progressively more downbeat. Until Sheringham scored. The place went wild. And then just about calmed down again to watch the reply. Except it wasn't a replay it was Soljskaer. Cue bedlam.

This time, I was East of the Pennines watching in the pub across the road. Gulping Stella next to a wise guy pointing out how rubbish Harry Kewell was. Not that I needed to be told. Leeds fans. At half time I skulked out to nurse my grief and shame at home. One turkey sandwich later we start again, and then it happens. We started to dream.

The rest was just awful - and my heart attack is no doubt in the post - but it was obviously our night. Logic, physics and common sense were overruled by narritivium, which says the better story will happen and that million to one shots happen nine times out of ten (TM Terry Pratchett).

And there you have it. And we have it for keeps. And if only they kick Everton out to make way for us joy will be complete and unbounded.

Campioni, campioni...

15th April

Today is one of terrible anniversaries.
It is the date of the Hillsborough disaster during which 96 people lost their lives.
It is also the anniversay of the liberation of Belson. My father was one of the liberators, though he never spoke of it, apart from to say of Schindler's List that good as it was the people were wrong. The real inmates were far thinner than any modern actor could ever be.

Let's try to make sure neither ever happens again.

Here is a link to the BBC coverage of Belsen in 1945.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/in_depth/4445811.stm

That entertainment

Merseyside derby, glorious play from the mighty reds, multiple injuries, no protection from the referee, missed chances, a sending off and victory to the rightous. Phew.

No if only we had a striker. Just the one would do.

So, Juve then...

Ah well. There's always next year.

Without Gerrard. Or Kewell. Or even Benitez. Or European footie of any kind.

Ho, hum...

you know you're getting old...

when you listen to a review of a new film (9 songs) which is about two people have (real) sex inbetween concert footage of bands, and you find yourself wondering if the songs were good...

I'll get my coat.

anybody know a good goalkeeper?

What were the odds that the Mighty Reds would be the only English team in the Champions League not to lose, but in fact to crush Bayer Leverkeusen? I make it a point to support British clubs in Europe (hard though that is much of the time), but a certain Schadenfreude has to be enjoyed this week. If only we had managed to keep it at 3-0. I dread the return matches, when no doubt we will pull improbable defeat from the jaws of certain victory. I remember the last time when the peerless Jari Litmanen tried to single handedly get us through, and M. Houllier sabotaged it with the crazy idea of taking off Didi Haman.

Must admit I am kind of hoping Barca manage to take Chelsea down a peg or two. And fervently hoping we achieve the minor miracle of winning the Carling cup on Sunday. I shall not be there, but instead in Edinburgh to watch Scotland vs Italy in the 6 Nations. God I thought footie tickets were expensive...

Fear and Lothing in West Yorkshire

"faster, faster, until the love of speed overcomes the fear of death"

Farewell Hunter S Thompson


Chalk up another suicide victim to the cult of Hemmingway. But HST was a better writer, or at least a funnier one. Which amounts to the same thing most of the time.

I support London 2012

Yes, I know that it is yet another thing in the endless sink hole that is the south of Britain.
And yes I know the benefits will probably not be as big as claimed (believe me, I really know).
And yes, the money could be spent on other things instead.
But be honest;
The money saved would not be spent on alleviating child poverty, more schools and hospitals, third world debt relief or any of the other things people always talk about as worthy causes.
It would probably go on;
cruise missiles
tax relief for the rich
More security guards to keep out the talented individuals trying to come to our country to build our schools, work in our hospitals, pay our taxes and keep our population from falling into a black hole (like it is in France, Italy and Spain) and therefore pay our pensions when we get older
And bloody ID cards so the government can imprison the rest of us whilst allowing terrorists (who are rich, dammit) to get very good, very expensive forgeries.

Go on, admit it, it would be fun. Might make us feel better if we do it right. And we might even win a few more medals - allowing even the Daily Mail to make heroes out of Black Lesbians!

And the clincher? It would piss the French off something rotten.

slow on the uptake

I've only just realised how big Joy Division have become, 20 years or more after their end.
It feels a bit strange to realise that the world has come round to my way of thinking, and recognises them as one of the great bands. I still think that nobody has heard of them, or ever wants to - despite New Order. It was bizarre to see them shortlisted as one of the bands of the 80s (or was it 70s) on Channel 5. My generations Velvet Underground I guess - no one heard them at the time, but everyone who did formed a band.

My band didn't sound anything like Joy Division...

wife knows better

Her suggestion for great lyrics was;
"I am angry, I am ill and I'm as ugly as sin" Magazine, Song from under the floorboards, from The Correct Use of Soap. Which manages to be both great and a retelling of Notes from Underground by Dostoyevski. Neat. Most "literary" rock makes me want to reach for my revolver...

what are words worth?

Word magazine has just run an article about the best (and worst) lyrics in music. Stimulating stuff. My two favourites were not included, though I have to agree with the opening lines of Highway 61 being one of the best.

Anyway, my favourites:
"people die, so will I" - Microdisney, Birthday Girl
"I don't believe in an interventionist God" - Nick Cave, Into my arms. Hell of a way to begin!

It's behind you...

Well, it is pantomime season, so we shouldn't be surprised that Roy Caroll joined in the fun. Just what you have to do to be allowed to score against Man Utd at Old Trafford is a different question. Obviously getting the ball over the line is not enough.

Anyway, stopped us Liverpool fans feeling quite so miserable after Mike Reily's attack of fear that stopped him giving us a penalty for handball against Chelsea. In fact at times I thought he was allowing Chelsea to play handball, so often did they play the ball with their hands and arms. I actually thought Chelsea would be better than they were. On tv you see a distorted view. Thierry Henry is actually better and faster than he seems on tv - amazing though that is. Chelsea play with the worst kind of petulant gamesmanship - kicking the ball away at free kicks, multiple rolls after minor collisions. Their defense and goalkeeper are very good though.